Doing better, but not in the clear yet

Over the past few weeks I’ve been feeling down (in case you didn’t notice). I didn’t know how to get out of my slump and I kinda thought this was how the real world is. Don’t worry, I’ve started doing a lot better.

Before I tell everyone how I’m doing now I want to thank everyone for their concern. I’ve had a bunch of people ask me if I’m okay and try and help me to feel more up beat. With their concerns and some effort of my own I’m doing much better.

After having a good ending to my weekend with Smiles I was determined, yet again, to have a good week too. My first morning alone looked like I had already failed. I hit the slump again and didn’t do much during the day. By 6pm I was frustrated that I was doing nothing and frustrated how out of shape I was from not leaving the Apartment. I went on a jog and did a workout routine I found online. This left me feeling much better about myself.

All of this exercise glee got me excited, energetic and raring to go. I organized my room, worked on tire belts and was super productive up until about 2am when I forced myself to go to sleep.

This morning I started of the day running errands and then had so much to do and so much excitement for doing it that I missed my normal slump. Instead I was enjoying myself and excited for all I had to do today (instead of being excited for the day to be over and Smiles to come home again). Before I left to volunteer at PAT’s I felt the need to rock out to some Gaga, specifically Bad Kids.

This brought me back to the days of sophomore year of college. I remember that I would rock out to music while trying to find an outfit that matched my scattered crazy mood. Mostly I failed, or looked like a schizophrenic [flashback back to the day I wore a Hunting Jacket, Auxiliary Officer button up with a “This is what a Penn State Feminist looks like” shirt, girl pants, and working man boots. Dr. D’s wife Mrs. E felt the need to comment saying only, “You look like a schizophrenia”]. Don’t worry I didn’t dress very crazy, I didn’t have anything that could describe that mood outwardly, atleast that I was comfortable wearing in public.

Yep, I was feeling crazy, excited, weird, and upbeat, then I went to PAT. I ended up having a great time. I was much more talkative and chatted up nearly all the people there. I started to form some friendships with the people too, instead of just being the awkward quite kid that comes in and helps out. I also got invited to a PAT party this Saturday. I’m very excited.

I finally am starting to feel like I’m starting to fit-in in Philly. Like this may be a place where I could live and have friends and such.

Had to tell you the good news. No need to worry y’all I’m doing much better now, and despite the title of this blog I think I’ll make it into the clear

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One thought on “Doing better, but not in the clear yet

  1. Glad you’re feeling better, I’ve been worrying. Savages and I both have a tendency toward some serious mid-winter ennui/existentialism so the Cabin has been similar lately.

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